I just cant see

myself with anyone other then you.
I made up my mind that you were all I wanted a very long time ago.
I know eventually I will neecd to change the way I feel.
But, as of right now it's not going to change.
And I don't want to be with anyone other then you.
I wish you could just feel the same way about me as you used to.
Love does not die.
It just doesn't.
I just wish you'd let this work out.
I know it can.
I suppose i can be lonely if you're happy.
But, I just love you so very much. And want to be with you more than anything..
=[
I just don't understand why I am not good enough for you anymore.
Why you just gave up on me.,
I trusted you with everything I had.
Now I am left with nothing.
I am a mess.
I am nothing without you.
Hmfs.
I am not okay. I wish I was.
But, I am not okay at all.
Why can't I just be happy without you? Why can I just not be unattached?
Why can't I just get rid of my feelings for you as you did to me?
Fuck this.
Fuck everything.

It has been

almost a month now and nothing has gotten any easier.
If anything it's only gotten harder.
And I hate this.
I want you so very badly.
I want you with all my heart and soul..... ='[
Ef.

"Oh baby baby baby please My heart sinks to my feet What am I supposed to do I think about you nightly "

Music

is my only escape now.

I need to

leave this place. And never come back.
Never look behind me.
Never look back.
Never think of this place again.
I need to leave now.

I've come to the conclusion

that no matter what it is in my life.
If it's good I am going to ruin it.
I am going to just completely and utterly fucking ruin it.
I want to run away from everything. Just fucking hide away.
I don't need to be here. There's no reason.
I just disapoint. And that's how it's always going to be.

I want to scream

at the top of my lungs so you know that I still exsist.
I want to exsist. I don't want to fade away. I can't be happy without you. I've tried so hard. Hmfs. I just want to be happy. I just, I dont know anymore. Why can nothing go my way? I just want things to go my way just once... >_>

Wrong

about everything once again
Yep.
FUCK.
Myranda=Fucking moron.
I just wanted to believe in you. I put way to much of my trust in you. And once again I am stuck fucking hating myself.
Once again I am stuck in this fucking slump. A slumpp you keep pulling me out of and than putting me right back in it.
FUCKKK.

I was wrong

it wasn't okay to feel safe.
And to think that everything was going to go my way.....
I hate my life.
I just want to crawl under a rock and never come out again.
I just don't want to be around anymore.

This just is not

where I wanted my life to be at.
I saw myself either graduated or getting ready to.
I saw us happier than ever. Getting ready to move in together. To plan the rest of our life together. This is just so disapointing. I want it to be at that point so very bad. I know it's not going to happen. But, that's what I want so very bad. Eh. FML