I Don't understand

how everything can go back to being perfect.
Than than the next day it starts going to way it's going now...
It just doesn't make sense.

I didn't.

realize how long it has been since I blogged. Maybe that's why I have felt so sad lately. I don't really have anyone to talk to. I only have one problem in life. Him. I hate the fact that I love. I hate the fact that he's been so misleading. I just don't get this at all. Heh. I just can't move on. This has been a problem since what Febuary? And yet, everything gets better for a little bit, and than all at once all of my happiness is ripped away from me. I can't take it anymore. I really can't. I can not be happy without him. I try so very hard. So hard. Yet, it just doesn't happen. I just want my life back. I just want it back so bad. That'd be the greatest thing ever. Eh. My mind seriously just feels like it's going to explode. My whole body hurts, all the time. I just don't feel like myself. And I just want things to go my way for once. Just once. I just want to be content.. I just want to feel content for just a little while. FUCK. >_<