Wednesday, August 12, 2009
It's
been awhile since I have wrote something. I think that's a good sign for me? It seems like I tend to blog more when I am upset. I haven't really been extremely upset in awhile. And I am happy about that. Everything has been pretty good. I think that my relationship might actually be going the way that I want it to go. At least I hope that it is. My life seems to be stuck. I don't know what to do. I don't want to go back to school, but I do want a high school diploma. I just wish I would not have gotten so caught up in my emotions and had been able to finish last semester. Instead of screwing shit up. I don't know. I don't really know what to say right now. I am pretty content with everything. Just a few minor problems come up. But they are no biggies just things that I seem to over react about.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Everything
Seems to be going the way that I want them to go.
I am going to be more cautious this time though.
I can't go into with my whole heart all at once this time.
I just have to take it slow with myself.
It's just so hard not to go into this with everything I have.
I really do want to go into it with everything I do have, but I am just scared. I trusted you with everything my heart my soul and you hurt me again. And why I don't even know.
And you came back, and I know that I didn't make you feel bad or make you feel like you had to be with me. I did everything in my power to not talk to you, to ignore you, to act like you were not effecting me at all. Even though I was just completely numb. I couldnt stop crying. But, I just didn't let it show. Even after how much I have been hurt by you. I love you more than ever. I get the greatest feeling whenever we are near. And I would not trade it for anything in the world. All I want is for this to be the greatest thing ever which I know it can be. I do not want any one other than you. I could never imagine being with any one but you. I just, I don't know what to do. I can trust you with my heart again, and I will. I just hope that I am making the right choice. I do love you more than anything in the whole wide world. I just need you to try. Try like I know you can. Try like I know you want to. I know that you have problems but I don't care. We can get past it. =D <3
I am going to be more cautious this time though.
I can't go into with my whole heart all at once this time.
I just have to take it slow with myself.
It's just so hard not to go into this with everything I have.
I really do want to go into it with everything I do have, but I am just scared. I trusted you with everything my heart my soul and you hurt me again. And why I don't even know.
And you came back, and I know that I didn't make you feel bad or make you feel like you had to be with me. I did everything in my power to not talk to you, to ignore you, to act like you were not effecting me at all. Even though I was just completely numb. I couldnt stop crying. But, I just didn't let it show. Even after how much I have been hurt by you. I love you more than ever. I get the greatest feeling whenever we are near. And I would not trade it for anything in the world. All I want is for this to be the greatest thing ever which I know it can be. I do not want any one other than you. I could never imagine being with any one but you. I just, I don't know what to do. I can trust you with my heart again, and I will. I just hope that I am making the right choice. I do love you more than anything in the whole wide world. I just need you to try. Try like I know you can. Try like I know you want to. I know that you have problems but I don't care. We can get past it. =D <3
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